People tend to justify some inappropriate secret-keeping with the self-righteous claim that, “It’s no one’s business,” or–better yet–“It’s private.” So what is the difference between privacy and secrecy–and how do you know if you’re being private–which is okay–or secretive, which can… Continue Reading
So we return to secrets hidden in plain sight, and particularly to Miriam’s* mentally unstable father, Max,* whom everyone seemed to know about, but no one actually mentioned. Max didn’t come out during the day. Ever. When there were certain… Continue Reading
Patty was pregnant with her second when she and Peter sought counseling for marital tension. During their couples’ work, they revealed that both pregnancies had required in vitro assistance. The issue of secrets came up with a double-whammy. Part I… Continue Reading
If we’re to take an honest look at secret-keeping–and that involves our own–we need to ask ourselves some fundamental questions about why we continue in our path of secrecy. Ask yourself these–and be honest: 1. Who else knows this secret?… Continue Reading
Benjamin Fanklin said many, many wise things, and this saying speaks to one of the simplest dangers of keeping a secret–the secret isn’t safe if more than one person holds it. “Three may keep a secret,” wrote Ben–“if two of them… Continue Reading
Throughout the years I have dealt with secrets in many forms and permutations. The issue must be addressed, of course, of the difference between privacy and secrecy, for everyone deserves their privacy. But secrecy, I have learned well, often involves… Continue Reading
