Dividing Financial Responsibilities

So if you’ve spent some time thinking about it, in an organized fashion, you’ll probably realize that there are fundamentally only four different permutations of ways to divide financial responsibilities. You’ll also probably be intimately familiar with one of them.… Continue Reading


Avoid Financial Betrayal: Be Your Own Detective

I warned in several posts against ignorance of financial matters in a relationship, much as a person might like to abdicate financial responsibility. But the issue arose again, and reminded me how urgent it is that each partner remain alert to… Continue Reading


Money May Equal Power in Couple Relationships

So, let’s assume, for the moment, that I’m that marriage counselor competent in financial matters,  and a couple with an unequal money-power ratio has come to me. Let’s assume you, the reader, are part of that dyad. So, if you’re… Continue Reading


Financial Deceit in Marriage

A beautiful woman with a twice-mortgaged house in an expensive suburb finds her husband somewhat less than enamored with her chronic spending. Fights ensue after each purchase that she finds reasonable–a ‘must-have,’ really–and he perceives as an outrageous waste of… Continue Reading


The Checkbook–His, Hers, Ours?

Ok, so you’re working together to create a financial plan acceptable to both of you.  Why not begin with the checkbook? Ask yourselves this question about how to handle the checkbook–do you want one checkbook–or three? Let’s say you like… Continue Reading


How to Communicate About Money

So you’ve bought into my proposition in my last entry that unequal financial power that is not discussed will lead to distancing everywhere, including the bedroom.  But how should couples communicate about such a difficult topic? Let’s start with a… Continue Reading


Don’t Be Naive: Not All Spouses are Trustworthy with Money

Besides the more elaborate and dramatic financial narratives, there are scenarios that can be covered in several sentences, but that should serve as models of what to look out for, or what can happen to the person who isn’t looking… Continue Reading


Watch Your Finances: Not All Spouses Are Trustworthy

A couple decides to go into business together. The husband Sam* has all the training–he offers practice management seminars for dentists. The word around town is that he’s an excellent dentist–and a strong teacher. The wife Sally,* who previously worked at… Continue Reading