Let’s address what happens when the ones campaigning for attention of a certain parent are a child–and the new spouse. Look, let’s face it. Your child has very little cause to be invested in your new marriage. Either he’d like… Continue Reading
Did you ever get the feeling you might have missed something? (In point of fact, I had that feeling all through organic chemistry, and, since I never really could figure out what I missed–but knew for certain I hadn’t gotten… Continue Reading
In the last five posts I addressed several different kinds of problem marriages, where often the basic underpinnings of the marriage are weak, and thus one or more partners often ends up asking if they should stay or go. Let… Continue Reading
There’s nothing I find more satisfying than believing in something–and then knowing that the research backs me up. When it happens the other way it’s a total bummer. But I happen to be in luck on the topic of mediation,… Continue Reading
So let’s say you’re in a “what’s in it for me?” stance when the option of mediation is broached. It’s reasonable–you’ve been through a terrible time in your marriage, and you don’t want to get taken for a ride. You’re… Continue Reading
Judith and Jay* had a checkered relationship, as so many long-term marrieds do. They had weathered raising the children, as well as the empty-nest syndrome. Sometimes she drove him round the bend with her non-stop chatter and tendency to cheer-lead; she… Continue Reading
To start your proactive work on preventing rivalry for a parent’s attention between siblings or between children and a new spouse, I recommend that you as the parent and step-parent consciously partition your home time into four parts: time with… Continue Reading
Well, your spouse pulled that old Mitt Romney, “I changed my mind” on you, and now you don’t even recognize your own marital territory. It’s hard–and my heart goes out to you. But before you make any decisions, I think… Continue Reading
What do you do when faced with a situation like Trish’s, where your partner loses a career and becomes a mere shadow of him or herself? Or one like Timothy’s, where your life’s mate morphs into someone you don’t know… Continue Reading
Betty and Brian* were confirmed atheists, and had been since they were teenagers. So when her Catholic family and his Jewish family protested about their marriage, they laughed at the small-mindedness of their parents and threw themselves a huge wedding… Continue Reading
Tamika* and Timothy* had an unusual arrangement, but it worked for them. Tamika, an open-heart surgeon, became quite successful, to the point where she was able to take only private pay patients. She surely brought home the bacon. And Timothy did… Continue Reading
It probably seemed pretty clear how the first problem marriage structure, of the over- and under-functioning spouses, could lead to marital stress–although many of these couples stay together for the long-term. The second ‘problem marriage,’ in my view, though, is that… Continue Reading
